“Motherhood is a shot of adrenaline to the heart. It is mundane and it is magical. It is waking up to the wisdom in our marrow, while laughing at the cosmic joke that we know nothing at all.” V.R.
In my time as an early years educator, parents would occasionally come to me asking for advice. The problem being, of course, that there is no one-size-fits-all to parenting; no rule book that says “if this, then that”. Children are complex beings with complex needs; parents are, too. It is impossible to offer advice without first understanding the family, their circumstances, and their unique needs.
Nevertheless, pressed to say something, I always went with:
trust. your. heart.
Over the years, I’ve come to realize how problematic this advice is. There are days, weeks, months, even years, where we can’t hear our heartsong as clearly as we’d like to. Through the cries and the whining, the sleepless nights, the tantrums and fighting…the admonishing looks from passerby-ers, the advice from (probably well meaning) friends and family…the weight of societal expectations, the comparison of social media, the anxiety of 1000 parenting books with 1000 different parenting ideas, not to mention our own early years conditioning…
It’s no wonder our heartsong can find herself buried. She’s still there, albeit little more than a whisper sometimes.
“Only when you have mastered the art of telling my liver how to cleanse blood and of telling my kidneys how to filter water will I allow you to tell my heart how to mother. To the ones who know it all.” V.R.
I wholeheartedly believe that the ability to parent in a way that leaves us feeling happy and deeply connected with our children exists in each and every one of is. It is instinctual — we were born to do this. It is also natural; if we let it, nature does it’s part to assume a fair share of the responsibility.
The difficulty many of us face is when we let outside influences, or our own experiences of childhood, stifle the knowing that is within us all.
“I must unshackle myself from the harsh voices,
plunge deep into my gut, and trust that I can mother from there instead.” V.R.
So in case you find yourself needing some support (we weren’t meant to do this alone). Guidance. Insight. Someone to take you gently by the hand and lead you back to your heart.
I am here.
I bring with me a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology, over ten years of working with children and families in a variety of settings, a Diploma in Forest School Education, and a Holistic, Baby-Led Sleep and Well Being Specialization.
Perhaps most importantly, I bring with me the experience of becoming a parent. It shook me. Knocked me off my high-horse. Some days I was in awe of my body, my ability to stay patient, my love and adoration for this child that found herself in our lives.
Some nights I went to bed exhausted, or overwhelmed, feeling like a failure, unable to remember why I ever thought I’d be great at this. It wasn’t until I sought help that I realized I held the power to mother in a way that was right, and fulfilling, for us all along. And now I’m here to extend that same help to you.
“Each time a mother, somewhere,
forgives herself for being human,
earth exhales a little. Breathe.” V.R.
I am excited to work with you. Not because you or your child(ren) need fixing, but because sometimes when we’re in the the thick of it all it can be hard to locate ourselves on the map. Let me guide you back to yourself. Restore the confidence and motivation that once defined you. Offer you advice and insight where needed. Resources that can further support you and your family.
You are a wonderful parent. You have wonderful children. Let me guide you back to that.
T’is a brave thing indeed to be such a tender-hearted mama in a broken-hearted world. V.R.
The quotes listed on this page are from Vicki Rivard's amazing book on postpartum, Brave New Mama.